


Variations Of Goodbye

by LI0NH34RT



Series: Birthday Stories [2]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: I broke my happy endings only rule for you!, M/M, Sad Ending, Sadness, Thiam, are you happy now Sab?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-30
Updated: 2018-07-30
Packaged: 2019-06-18 16:37:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,006
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15490131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LI0NH34RT/pseuds/LI0NH34RT
Summary: Theo is gone and Liam tries to understand.





	Variations Of Goodbye

**Author's Note:**

  * For [TrashWrites](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TrashWrites/gifts).



> Happy Birthday you angsty little bean. May your words come back to you soon. ♡

_Departure... final kiss..._

The words traced past Liam’s yearning fingertips. Today was the same as yesterday; he sat alone on the floor of his messy room, books scattered all around her, with a sick thesaurus on his lap, resting on his splayed legs.

_Farewell... Melancholy eyes..._

He lost all track of time, his curtains tightly drawn around his windows so that only a singular beam of light fell inside his room, so it illuminated his spot. It was the only light he tolerated in the area, he wanted to read his books, to forget.

_Parting... hands that released his grip..._

Liam never knew if he could ever forgive Theo for leaving him. Ever since he was alone, he seemed to have lost himself, so he dug out the thesaurus, looking for different words of goodbye. With every new word he engraved into his heart, he thought of a feature Theo had.

_Au revoir... pursuing a better education..._

He wondered, his blond hair falling over his face, casting shadows like the first hints of night seeping in to the dispel the light of the day. That was what Liam felt like.

Was Theo happy were ever he was? Without Liam? He didn’t know how he could ever let the love of his life go.

_Leaving... cowardly words..._

Liam trusted Theo and sent him of happily, knowing that he was leading, expanding his boundaries overseas, breaking free of the chains that were Beacon Hills, so he could have a better future for both of them. Liam often mused himself before going to bed, what his lover would be doing. Was he in class? Showering? Sleeping?

Did the moon and stars watch over Theo like overarching protectors, like he prayed for them to do? Did the way they shone remind him of those he left behind?

_Parting... tears on the thesaurus..._

His body shook violently with sorrow that day, when Theo said he wasn’t going to return.

He asked why, voice already breaking. Why not coming back when he was so patiently waiting at home for his lover to return? Did he do something wrong?

He didn’t understand, and Theo answered in so cold words, as if he was a stranger he just met instead of his dear boyfriend. The one who he loved the most, more than how the ocean waves adored the moon that was always out of their reach whenever they crashed futilely on the beach's warm sands.

_Godspeed... A boy's hair in Theo’s fingers that wasn’t Liam's..._

Theo found someone else, someone better of course. How could he not. Liam always had feared the day this would happen, the day Theo realized that he was worth it, that he deserved so much more than what Liam could give him in the small world of Beacon Hills. That a simple boy, who loved him with all his heart wasn’t enough to hold the phenomenon that was Theo Raeken.

And yet Liam couldn’t bring himself to fully hate him. He wrote a letter, the most soothing, calming words he could extract from his books, showing the pain of his yearning heart behind the letters on the page like the memory of sea foam abandoned on the sand after the waves left.

 

He never got a reply and that sparked the strange longing for different words than what he had sent his love. Maybe if he searched long and hard enough, he would find some Theo would like. Or he would finally understand where he went wrong. Why Theo could so easily erase him, abandon him so easily as if he was never an integral part of his life.

Like he never loved him.

_Exodus... gullibility..._

His coarse fingertips travelled over a new word today. He reencountered the pain he had felt that long gone day. The one that shattered any sense of future or joy in him. Theo was his moon, his anchor, and Liam was the sea, calmed by his mysterious powers, yet always reaching out endlessly in hopes that he would come in grasp one day.

How could he have been so foolish? Did he really think he was enough, special enough to hold Theos attention? Of course he would find someone better.

_Embarkation... no more news..._

He probably wrote to him countless times, a corner of his room had a stack of letters, carefully organized, painstakingly towering over the books. He wrote so many different words, as if he was a wizard concocting all different sorts of spells, but with words. Words were a spell on their own.

Liam never bought himself to sent them to Theo. Not after the first one, and so the pile grew, but never reached the destination he wanted the words to. If Theo read the millions of letters that bloomed under his trembling agonized hands, would it have changed his mind?

_Exit... four thousand and nine hundred and ninety eight words..._

So many words, so many books, for his pain, yet none could explain his tormented state. He simply didn’t understand what was happening to him. He had been in love before – at least that was what he thought it has been.

He justified his obsession. If you’re stuck in a situation, what else could anyone do other than passionately hunt for answers? He couldn’t just smile, brush his legs of and move on.

_Bon voyage... should he have let him leave in the first place?_

Liam cautiously shut his exhausted, red eyes. Everything hurt too much; every time he closed his eyes, he could see Theo smiling shyly at him.

If he cursed the moon, would Theo come back to him? Would he see a miracle? Would Theo take back the moment he sealed his fate?

_Take off... five thousand words for goodbyes..._

 

Then his door creaked open and his world stops turning for the second time in his life. A bag is dropped to the floor. Arms opened, half expecting a hug. Eyes full of hope, and that damned crooked smile on the lips.

 

“Hello Liam...”

 


End file.
